as the end draws near...

Maybe I'm just overreacting, which wouldn't be out of the ordinary for me, but I feel like my relationship is coming to an end.

The truth is, I'm tired. I'm really, really tired of everything. The fights, the early morning/late night calls when he knows I have to go to work the next morning, the constant disrespect and disregard for my culture, family, geographical location, etc. I love him to death, but how far can I go on if I'm truly tired?

This is the first time I've seen an end coming and I know what I need to do. A break may work, but then again a permanent break will probably be better. The thing about this ending is that it's a sad one. In the past my relationships have ended on a harsher, angrier note. There was resentment and name-calling and a number of other ugly things. This one is different. I still have the same feelings for him as I did when we first met. I can't help him anymore because he simply won't let me. He says I don't know him, but how can I know him if he won't let me in?

I think Facebook should have an "In a Failing Relationship" option. We already let our business be known all over the internet so why not reveal the true status of our most private moments? So unless this is fixed (and it definitely takes two WILLING individuals to do so), I may have to change mine to "Single" soon.

That's all for now...

without further ado...

I'd like to introduce

GRUMPY!

I know I've mentioned him here once or twice but never devoted an entry just to him. As most of you know, I've wanted a miniature dachshund for years. I finally had my dream come true on May 2 of this year. My parents got Grumpy for me as a graduation gift. I adopted him from Doxie Acre Dachshund Rescue out of Germanton, NC, and I couldn't be happier.

This little dog is the light of my life. He only weighs 11 pounds, but he brings ten times that much love to me everyday. At first I wasn't sure that we would bond because he seemed to love my brother a lot. The first day I had him he was just becoming used to his new environment, so he cried and whined for his foster dad to come back. Grumpy was sad for a few hours, but soon found solace in my brother's arms. Unfortunately I had to go back to school that night for a final exam the next morning, so Grumpy and Thomas bonded while I was gone. Later the next day, mom called me and told me that I better come home or I wasn't going to have a dog! I rushed home and held and played with Grumpy until eventually we were inseparable. The hard part came just two days later when I had to go back to school to turn in my last final and clean up my apartment, oh yeah, and GRADUATE! So even though the day I'd been waiting for since 2006 was finally upon me, all I could think about was my little Grumpster, who was sitting at home missing me. On May 9, after a special graduation, all I could think about was getting home to my little doggie. I'm so glad that we bonded so well. He follows me around the house constantly and sits on a chair by the window watching for me to get home. I love Grumpy so much and I can't imagine a better dog. He's very playful but also shy around other people at first. He loves to roll on his back and have his belly rubbed and snuggle in piles of blankets and pillows on the days we change sheets. This little dog honestly makes me feel a love I've never felt before and I'm just so happy to have him in my life! He's the perfect companion for me, so waiting so long to get him was well worth it.